The Paostian Deal

It makes funny sense, Across the Universe’s title. And even dumb moviegoers like moi would recognize it. After T.V. Carpio sang her lovely lesbo version of I Want To Hold Your Hand, the movie does exactly that: send you across the universe. My mind was lounging with my cousins in Saturn when a sad, old, gay critique ramped down the aisle and announced, “Catastrophic!”, while Evan Rachel Wood was being dragged down the stairs by cops. Very lonely indeed, that fag. It’s a good thing Jim Sturgess was hot as his character Jude and Joe Anderson was cute as Max. At least half the popcorn was worth that huge music video of a Beatles medley masked as a movie.

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Another example of how McDonald's fools us all: No medium-size Coke. Either you let five drops satisfy you with its small glass and 57 pieces of tube ice, or you dream of diabetes with the large glass. I believe that life can be sorted out fast by choosing only between two extremes but when I’m offered imitation iced tea in “just the right” size, more than mocking my beliefs, it’s So Annoying.

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It’s been over seven months since I was transferred to another department in the office. But it feels so slow and it's like I’ve been moved to a thousand teams simultaneously. Multiplicity at its best—I’m practically the company whore who’s called every time a need arises. So I tried to take action:

“How do I apply for a raise?” I asked somebody in the HR department.

“I dunno. You can apply for that?”

“I think so, yeah, ‘coz I heard that you can by… Wait you should know this stuff!”

Me = Sucker.