22 February 2008
Rantoms
If you have to go, PLEASE pee on the john instead of your hands, especially when there's no butler waiting to open the door for you from the outside.
Whenever I catch a female TV celebrity announce "I eat like a man!", my eyebrow soars. Then I realize not all men are straight. I guess those bimbette's do live by the adage, pink of health.
It's been two months since I was promised a "Christmas gift". Either the Santa sent it to my polar twin in Rome or I should just become Jewish and get all these over with.
For cleaner and less disgusting toilet bowls, I'm begging, for beefcakes please use anti hair-fall shampoo.
When you expect the unexpected, why should it still be called unexpected? And when your expected unexpected came, should others still believe your... shock?
When a stranger grabs any of your body parts on the street, you yell and look for a police officer. When a lady suddenly grabs your arm while crossing the street, it's time to trim that tummy.
There is always an Annual Search For __________. WHY? If we're so pretentious that our "belief in" and "affection for the chosen ones" only last for about 360 days (300 if dethronement issues arise, 3 if sponsorship is measly), then let's stop wasting money and search for better things: like the Dumb-Colegiala Slayer of the Year (with body count as the only criterion), the Cockroach Annihilator of the Year and the Closet Queen of the Year.
The US government deletes Northern Rockies grey wolves from the endangered species list. So they can hunt them down again. When I act stupid, I try to do it more subtly.
If we "open our hearts and arms we encourage others to do the same", then why hasn't anyone attended any of my Movement Against Stupid Kolehiyalas conventions?
Whenever I catch a female TV celebrity announce "I eat like a man!", my eyebrow soars. Then I realize not all men are straight. I guess those bimbette's do live by the adage, pink of health.
It's been two months since I was promised a "Christmas gift". Either the Santa sent it to my polar twin in Rome or I should just become Jewish and get all these over with.
For cleaner and less disgusting toilet bowls, I'm begging, for beefcakes please use anti hair-fall shampoo.
When you expect the unexpected, why should it still be called unexpected? And when your expected unexpected came, should others still believe your... shock?
When a stranger grabs any of your body parts on the street, you yell and look for a police officer. When a lady suddenly grabs your arm while crossing the street, it's time to trim that tummy.
There is always an Annual Search For __________. WHY? If we're so pretentious that our "belief in" and "affection for the chosen ones" only last for about 360 days (300 if dethronement issues arise, 3 if sponsorship is measly), then let's stop wasting money and search for better things: like the Dumb-Colegiala Slayer of the Year (with body count as the only criterion), the Cockroach Annihilator of the Year and the Closet Queen of the Year.
The US government deletes Northern Rockies grey wolves from the endangered species list. So they can hunt them down again. When I act stupid, I try to do it more subtly.
If we "open our hearts and arms we encourage others to do the same", then why hasn't anyone attended any of my Movement Against Stupid Kolehiyalas conventions?
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